Let’s Pretend This Never Happened
A (Mostly True) Memoir by Jenny Lawson
2012 / 318 Pages
Jenny Lawson (A.K.A The Blogess) might be the most hilariously inappropriate author you’ve ever encountered. But it’s in a good way. Her tales of growing up in rural Texas with a taxidermy-enthusiast father will put your own crazy childhood stories to shame. Did you grow up attending armadillo racing contests? Didn’t think so. Were there live raccoons living in your bathtub who suffered from obsessive compulsive disorder? Yeah…me neither. Instead of barbies and baby dolls, did you play with a homemade squirrel puppet as a child (made from the carcass of a deceased squirrel)? I thought not. Well, Jenny Lawson did.
The Blogess also suffers from severe social anxiety, so she has quite a few socially awkward horror stories that rival those of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Poor Jenny. Everyone has embarrassing stories, sure…but Jenny just seems to be doomed for a life of adventurous embarrassment. Things that have happened to Jenny Lawson:
- She got her arm stuck inside a cow’s vagina in front of a room full of onlookers.
- She flooded her house with detergent soap bubbles
- She has been attacked by dogs
- Her childhood pet was eaten by a homeless person
- Her house was once infested by scorpions
Sure, some fairly average things have happened along the way, too (dating, marriage, kids), but Jenny Lawson is a magnificent storyteller, and these absurd tales are documented by photos just in case you don’t believe the craziness. She may be considered crass, offensive, and (as I mentioned before) highly inappropriate, but you’ll probably be too distracted by uncontrollable pee-your-pants giggling to take offense.
Let’s Pretend This Never Happened is wry, honest, and conversational. These aren’t formal, literary essays by any means, but her sense of humor translates perfectly in this unconventional collection. Somehow, Jenny Lawson has simultaneously managed to have the most entertaining and traumatizing life in history. And thank goodness she wrote a book about it!